What’s the single most important thing you can do to heal?
The answer is: to say “yes” to healing.
When we get hurt, either physically or emotionally, we tend to withdraw. A part of us pulls back and puts our guard up. This could take the form of muscles tensing up around an injured part of the body, or pulling away from other people after a difficult social interaction.
In this pulling back we resist the flow – of energy through the body, of emotions that we don’t want to feel.
This can also happen when an event comes up in our life that goes against our idea of what “should” be. When we don’t want to accept what is, it’s as though an inner part of us crosses their arms, plants their feet and becomes immovable. This inflexible part of us stops the natural fluidity of our emotions and our life force energy.
Without flow, without allowing movement to happen, at least part of us remains stuck in our original hurt state. It’s ironic that our efforts to prevent further pain (in the form of guarding, protecting, hardening up) are the very thing that keep us from healing.
The body and the heart have an innate drive toward healing. If you cut your finger, unless some additional insult is introduced (like bacteria), it will heal on its own.
When we are guarding ourselves, we are essentially saying “no.” No, I won’t move; no, this isn’t really happening; no, I won’t forgive or forget; no, I won’t let this go because I don’t want anything like it to ever happen again.
We put all our focus on what we don’t want — what we are saying “no” to in life.
Saying “yes” to healing begins with giving ourselves permission to heal. It means softening where we had hardened, relaxing where we had tensed up, and being willing to see what is happening now. This doesn’t mean condoning or approving of whatever it was that caused the injury; it means being willing to be where we are. From this place we can begin to envision what we would like instead.
As we say “yes,” we allow the forces of nature to assist in our healing. We allow the movement that has wanted to carry us toward resolution all along.
Where have you not been willing to let something go?
Where are you resisting accepting the facts of a situation?
What are you focused on NOT wanting?
These questions will point you in the direction of where you’ve been withholding healing.
If you are willing, take a moment right now to say “yes.” Close your eyes, take a few breaths, and give yourself permission to heal. Imagine opening up to the energy of life and allowing it to move through a particular situation or through all areas of your life.
Saying “yes” unlocks the door – the one we had closed shut when we got hurt – so healing can happen. We can take this a step further by asking for assistance on our healing journey. Stay tuned for next week’s post about asking for help, especially when you’ve been reluctant to do so.